One Nation Under Geek (an apology)

January 23, 2013 at 1:42 am (Uncategorized)

I’m a geek. That’s not news to anyone who knows me, or anybody who’s even seen me. I’m all kinds of geek. Movie geek, horror geek, goth, science fiction geek, gaming geek, and so on, and so on. I’ve always been proud to be a geek. But I have not, in fact, always been kind to my fellow geeks.

When I was a very young geek and I first started going to science fiction conventions, there was a schism between the Star Trek geeks and the Dr. Who geeks. I was a Trekkie. The Whoites ran around with big goofy scarves, and we mocked them mercilessly. Of course, they mocked us right back for wearing our dopey polyester Star Trek shirts and talking into plastic communicators.

As I matured as a geek, I settled in with the pro crowd. We were professional writers, which kind of made us geek royalty. We weren’t jerks about it or anything, but we considered ourselves separate from the hordes of “fandom.” Despite the fact that I have action figures on my bedroom shelf and every episode of “Forever Knight” on DVD, I felt wasn’t JUST a fan. As a pro, I felt like I needed to maintain a certain level of decorum (you can stop laughing now), and not be, well, such a dork.

I am ashamed to say that my friends and I considered some aspects of fandom to be ridiculous. Despite the fact that I had seen every single episode of “Beauty and the Beast,” I thought furries were weird. The whole sexualized, anthropomorphic animal thing struck me as creepy. My reaction to furry culture in general was “ew.” I was never mean to furries, but I did my share of pointing and snickering.

Come on, it’s WEIRD to want to have sex with a furry woman with a fox head! Somehow, I forgot that I found the werewolf sex scene in Bram Stoker’s Dracula freakin’ HOT. Or maybe I didn’t forget, I just didn’t think about it in the same way. My strange little kinks were cool. Yours were icky. Sure, I wanted to have sex with Christopher Walken’s Headless Horseman character in “Sleepy Hollow.” But that’s SO much more normal than sexy mouse girls.


Geek culture has exploded since I was a kid. With the interwebs, we can all see each other. Goth, science, furry, Brony, steampunk, fantasy, horror, anime, Harry Potter, Twilight, LOTR, and on and on and on. There are as many flavors of geek as there are Bertie Bott’s jelly beans.

Okay, yeah, I do find some of those flavors unpalatable. Nothing on earth will ever convince me that “Twilight” is a good book series. But you know what? There’s no reason why I should rag on “Twilight” fans and basically say they’re not as smart as I am. One of the most brilliant little girls I’ve ever met in my life is a huge Twilight fan. I would never say or do anything to make her sad.

Which is not to say that parody and humor are out of the question. You can bet I’ll still make sparkly vampire jokes, and I’ll almost certainly tease my furry friends from time to time. But I no longer consider it an “us and them” situation.

We are all geeks, members of the international Geek Nation. We are one big freaky family. Come on, everybody’s got family members that they find a little weird. But that doesn’t make them not family.

We should look out for each other. Because if somebody is putting down one aspect of geek culture (and I mean really putting it down, not just funnin’), they’re putting us all down.

I am completely nuts about the musician/artist/writer/filmmaker Aurelio Voltaire. (And not just because he’s one of the sexiest humans who ever drew breath.) I’m in awe of his talent, and I love the fact that he accepts all of geekdom as his brothers and sisters.

There are Bronies, furries, and Twi-hards who are dear to my heart. They have just as much right to have fun with their geekiness as I do. Even if I find some aspect of your fandom to be silly, it’s your thang, do what you wanna do.

If I ever hurt your feelings regarding your geekdom, I apologize. I was being a tool.

And besides, whatever weird crap you do in the name of geekdom, it’s probably not as silly as me kissing my life mask of Vincent Price goodnight each evening before bed.



  1. cynickal said,


  2. Kirk Dooley said,

    As William Shatner says in his documentary, “Get A Life!!!”: “Can you imagine going to hundreds of Star Trek Conventions and asking yourself, ‘Who ARE these people?'”

    • Voltaire said,

      I can tell you who those people are.. they are the ones who made Shatner so damn fat and pay for the mortgage on his gigantic house.. that’s who. “Get a life” was a funny skit and a funny inside joke, a damn good one in fact. But in short, what any icon of geek culture SHOULD be thinking is not “who are these people?” but “THANK GOD FOR THESE PEOPLE!” ; )

  3. Rosie said,

    Reblogged this on Make Me a Sammich and commented:
    Tolerance is nearly always better than the alternative.

  4. Bridget McKenna said,

    We get older and we can hope we get wiser. Well said, Miz Lor!

  5. Voltaire said,

    Lorelei, thanks for mentioning me. I’m honored!!!

    • loreleishannon said,

      Thank YOU, Voltaire. It was you who inspired me to write this post in the first place.

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