Movie review: (horror) “Death 4 Told” (2004)

December 13, 2010 at 8:39 pm (horror, movies)

As many of you know, I have an extremely high tolerance for extremely low-budget movies. And this was was made on about 20 bucks. Bad video quality. BAD BAD BAD sound. I can get over that, if the writing is good. Um…not so much.

This is a horror anthology movies. I love those. I got hooked on them when I was a wee kid in the 70’s. I think Christopher Lee was in about a dozen of them. Anyway.

The first story is about a young couple who move into a creepy old house where a kid mysteriously died. Something starts stalking them around the house. This segment has an old-fashioned structure. Once the couple discover what the horrible thing is, they leave, the end. That worked fine in the 1930’s (Randolph Carter, anyone?), but it’s kind of unsatisfying for modern audiences. Still, it was OK.

Second story: Stupid kids run over Native American shapeshifter. Then go camping on the Indian burial ground. Werewolves eat everyone. Move along people, nothing to see here.

Third story: Pre-production crew sets up in an abandoned mental hospital, getting ready to shoot an “America’s Most Haunted” type show. Utterly predictable, but with a few creepy images. If it had been edited better, this might have been quite a decent short.

Fourth story: A frighteningly plastic surgeried Margot Kidder plays a fraudulent psychic who suddenly starts predicting people’s horrible deaths. Margot is a fine actress, and she was very funny in this role. Bonus: Lecy Goranson from Roseanne plays a demented housewife! Gotta love that. And finally, my sweetie Tom Savini shows up in the last ten minutes to wreak havoc! (And no, Tom doesn’t know he’s my sweetie. I woship him from afar.)

If Netflix would let me, I’d give this flick two and a half stars. Not the best thing I’ve ever seen, but far from the worst.

-Rated R
-2.5 stars
-Probably OK for older teens who are into horror

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